Little Mister Poolboy

The Way Way Back (2013)
Starring: Liam James, Steve Carell, Toni Collette, Sam Rockwell, Allison Janney, Maya Rudolph
Written and Directed by: Nat Faxton & Jim Rash

My Rating: 6.9
Worth: theater, on demand rental, and 2 hours fully paying attention
Clairometer: Holy Golightly

Take every moment when you wanted to punch Michael Scott in the jugular, add Sam Rockwell's brilliant destitute Tony Stark impression, a punch drunk Allison Janney who makes Lindsay Fünke look like mommy dearest, throw in 120 pounds of awkward teenage boy, and just a dash of hilarious "Dean-like" Jim Rash and cook over the high summer heat. This is the recipe for The Way Way Back. What does any of that mean? The film is excellent. There is a very Little Miss Sunshine feel to it. For example, The Way Way Back redefines the concept of a loving family and what it means to be accepted in one; Steve Carell plays an unexpected character; and it sheds light on the fact that adults are just as flawed as their kids. 

It is rare to watch a good movie that leaves you with a (very momentary, but) happy feeling. Jim Rash and Nat Faxton's third collaboration is far superior to The Descendants. However, it probably won't win an Oscar. Aliens don't invade. The top doesn't keep spinning. The oppressed Jewish girl doesn't kill the Nazis. This film is the JC Chasez to the Justin Timberlake (music, not acting obviously - did you see Alpha Dog? Funny I didn't either). He's just as good, but something is just missing. And that something in The Way Way Back is endurance. I know in 4 years I'll be trying to remember the title of this movie and why I liked it. I suppose I can check this blog to retrieve that information. Thanks Al Gore. 

What I'm Watching This Month

Orphan Black (2013)
Airs On: BBC America
Staring: TATIANA MASLANY, Dylan Bruce, Jordan Gavaris
Created By: John Fawcett, Graeme Manson

My Rating: 8.0
Clairometer: Erin Brockovich



Tatiana Maslany is in all caps and emboldened because she is the entire show. She plays 7 different characters, all from different countries and regions, with different accents, mannerisms, and motivations. Her absence from the Emmy list is a bigger crime than the fact that Sophia Vergara continues to be on it. The story line is interesting, the acting impeccable, and the writing is excellent. Why not a 10 you ask? The production value is lower than I would like (sorry Canada). It tends to take away from the quality of the show otherwise, bordering on cheesy at times. It is still quite worth your time, and good luck not becoming an enormous fan of Tatiana Maslany (I know, I know. That horse is dead. I'll put down the bat).   

The Mistakenly Un-Marketed Marketing Movie

Syrup (2013)
Starring: Amber Heard and Shiloh Fernandez
Written by: Max Barry, Aram Rappaport
Directed by: Aram Rappaport

My Rating: 5.8
Worth: No money, but 2 hours paying attention
Clairometer: Mathilda

This is based on a book, and it shows. I usually hate reviewing films based on books without having read the book, so as not to seem ignorant. I remember reading a scathing review of plot holes in The Hunger Games film that are clearly explained in the book. The screenwriters are most likely saving the explanation of the reviewer's complaints for the following three films. It just made the reviewer look like a putz. I hope I have not put myself in his shoes. All that being said, it seems like it's probably a good read, basing it off the witty dialogue and creative use of statistics. However, the plot is jumpy, disjointed, and occasionally unbelievable

To say that Kellan Lutz and Brittany Snow costar in this is ludicrous. If you're fans (not sure why you would be one of his) and only watching it because you see they're in it, don't bother. With that same logic, Misty May Treanor would be a huge fan of Cast Away.

Moving on to the true star of the film, Amber Heard. I heard Rhianna say once that she can make anyone attracted to her, straight woman, gay man, or otherwise. If that was ever true (trust me it wasn't) then she is henceforth dethroned by Amber Heard. She is a young Scarlett Johansson unscathed by Woody Allen's campy and at times creepy grasp. In this role, she is smart, attractive, professional and in charge. God bless her for getting out of the passenger's seat of Nicolas Cage's Buick Riviera and taking roles like this. While the film itself is not going on any rational person's "top 20 movies of all time list," her character is well written and fun to watch.

Syrup is worth watching for the comments on today's consumers, youth and relationships. In a sense we all are marketing ourselves to others - even our significant others - every single day.

What I'm Watching This Month

School started back this week, and in the days prior I did what any celluloid freak would do: binge watch television. I finished two seasons in less than 24 hours. Beware if you have time commitments.

Sherlock (2010 - 2014)

Starring: Benedict Cumberbatch and Martin Freeman
Airing on: BBC, although the 3rd season (or series as the British say) release date has yet to be posted. You can view the first two series on Netflix.

My Rating: 9.3 [A full 10 if Sherlock boxes, Watson gets a bull dog, and The Woman reappears in series 3]
Clairometer: Holly Golightly

I loved Robert Downey Jr.'s portrayal of Holmes. However, Benedict Cumberbatch embodies the icon while giving it a modern twist better than I imagined possible. I wanted to quote a witty conversation between Sherlock and Watson, but sans the actors' genius delivery, the words don't do it justice. Overall, the writing is impeccable, the acting superb, and the production quality is so high I would pay $15 to see each episode on an IMAX screen. The creators have clearly put their heart and soul into modernizing the story. Sherlock and Watson text, email and blog. The show even created the blogs accessible to fans. Dr. John Watson's Blog and Sherlock Holmes' Blog.

Too Real for Comfort

The Spectacular Now (2013)
Starring: Miles Teller, Shailene Woodley
Written by: Tim Tharp (novel), Scott Neustadter, Michael H. Weber
Directed by: James Ponsoldt

My Rating: 5.4
Clairometer: Erin Brockovich
Worth: no money, 2 hours heavily multi-tasked

My friend who has extreme difficulty expressing any opinions on films, be them positive or negative (which she will readily admit), said something quite profound when we exited the theater: "It was just a little too real." I couldn't have said it better myself, and in fact I haven't as noted by the title to this review. Viewers at Sundance loved it. I saw in USA Today that it was named the best film of the summer. And while the acting, writing, direction and everything else I usually care about were above average, there was still something not quite right. 

There is a growing trend of improvisation in independent movies these days, as well as less manufactured lighting, makeup, hair and costumes. I get it though. It's an esthetic. But for some reason, unless there is an extensive plot line or fabulous dialogue (see my post on The Place Beyond the Pines) it leaves a bad taste in my mouth and me feeling as though I could glean the same images going back to my hometown and people-watching at our local mall: Lots of tangled hair and dirty shirts, and overly frequent stuttering. Call me crazy, but movies are supposed to entertain us. That is their purpose at their core. I felt completely unentertained. 

It tales a story of an alcoholic (but this doesn't seem to be the point of the film) high school senior who can't get his life on track until he meets, hurts and loves a plain girl from his class. Their love story is unremarkable. Apart from specific details, it seems to be just like the tale of every other teenager's love story. The girl is too gullible and open with her heart (although I suppose that it is just every teenage girl. I don't know. I never was one). No viewer in his or her right mind would bet on the couple lasting past high school.

But I should note that at the current time stamp of this article, the film has a 93% with viewers on Rotten Tomatoes. Clearly I'm missing something.

What I'm Watching This Month

This concept is new. I hope that I can begin watching a new television show or miniseries every month. Who knows what will happen once school starts. I honestly feel as though this is a better time for television than for film. I know what your thinking, well then you picked a fabulous time to start a blog about movies. If you notice, I've slowly infiltrated good television shows into my discussion. However, the lack of quality movies being produced is all the more reason to write this blog and "dig through the dirt."

Veep (2011)
Starring: Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Tony Hale,
Anna Chlumsky, Matt Walsh, Reid Scott
Showrunner: Armando Iannucci
My Rating: 8.0
Television Show, Airing on HBO
Clairometer: Erin Brockovich

Anyone who knows me personally knows my distaste for HBO programing. That is, however, another post for another day. To describe Veep in a sentence I would say that it is a fabulous combination of Arrested Development-styled awkwardness and creative writing with a dash of dry British-esque humor and a pow of powerhouse acting by all involved. Veep was marketed horrifically. When I saw Julia Louis-Dreyfus on her press tour in 2011,  I got the impression that the show was a continuation of Tina Fey's portrayal of Sarah Palin from 2008; A sort of "what would happen if John McCain won?" But this is completely inaccurate. Selina, Julia's character, is a democrat. She's unmarried with one daughter. She has no crazy accent and does not claim to be from "the real America." She ran for president but lost in the primaries. Clearly there is no intention to politically comment on the Palin phenomenon. All this to say, watch Veep and you wont regret it. It's hilarious, uncomfortable, and genuinely entertaining.

The English Teacher

The English Teacher (2013)
Starring: Julianne Moore, Michael Angarano,

Greg Kinnear, Lily Collins, and Nathan Lane
Written by: Stacy and Dan Chariton
Directed by: Craig Zisk

My Rating: 5.3
Worth: 2 hours with lots of multitasking, no money
Clairometer: Erin Brockovich


I had high hopes for this, as quiet, bookish middle aged women are not typically protagonists. Calling an author trite is a plot point and apparently the worst thing one can say to an artist; however, I can't help but use it in describing this movie. Here are some steps to making a cliched film...

1. Make a woman smart but "ugly" by pulling her hair back and throwing on unattractive glasses. (even though she's clearly very attractive, and everyone notices anyway)
2. Make her fall down a lot in order to show that she's still funny. 
3. Show her going on failed blind dates in the beginning of the film to demonstrate why she makes the wrong choices in men later on in the film. 
4. Show her eating massive amounts of junk food to display her "depression." 
5. Make all the teenagers rude, obnoxious and completely ungrateful. 

The English Teacher involves a lonely woman (see numbers 1 - 4 above) whose life gets a little more theatrical when she encounters a 20 something former student. The film leaves many things unresolved, which is a no-no in old-fashioned screenplay writing 101. However, more and more films tend to do this these days so I suppose it is no longer taboo. That being said, something was clearly still missing. She is punished throughout the film for one wrong decision in a lifetime of impeccable service and devotion to her students. Perhaps that is a reality of life, but the tone of this film does not match such a dark theme - if that was the authors' intention. There are funny moments and Julianne Moore is lovely as always. Watch it if you are incredibly bored and don't have access to any of the movies listed in my 5 romantic movies that you might have missed post.